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I love Jimmy Carr. He never fails to cheer me up: until now.

If your parents aren't very good parents, sometimes you find yourself thinking you will NEVER be like them. For instance, one of my parents is - or was - an alcoholic. Whether he still drinks I do not know, I haven't seen him for years. I always told myself I'd never overdo it on alcohol as I saw what it did to him.

Now I'm sat here binge-drinking, as I have been doing for the past 6 nights. I saw how comatose it made my parent. Why wouldn't that work with me? Have you ever done this? If you have, take my advice: DON'T. Especially if you're on medication. If you're on tablets that you aren't supposed to combine with alcohol, do not binge drink. Once in a while, maybe, but not constantly night after night.

I'm considering talking to someone about it. The problem is I had the perfect opportunity to do so earlier and ended up lying and saying I'd only done it for one night out of the last 6 - now 7. Now I'm going to have to bring up the whole subject again only to admit that I was lying. Maybe that's better than just letting things fester.

I really don't know why I do this to myself sometimes. I've spent my life determined not to be like my alcoholic parent. I saw how badly it affected him, and in turn affected the rest of the household. Now I'm sat here following in his exact footsteps.

 


Comments

02/09/2012 6:52pm

It is tough when we sink into behaviors we swore we'd never do. Sometimes the best lessons are those on what NOT to do. But sometimes we have to experience those lessons ourselves, despite what we've witnessed. Good news is that you can start over at any moment, and make a different choice!

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